From The Onion…

Pac-Man Jones: I Will Be Nowhere Near Next Fridays Strip-Club Stabbing

The Onion

Pac-Man Jones: ‘I Will Be Nowhere Near Next Friday’s Strip-Club Stabbing’

LOS ANGELES—Suspended Tennessee Titans cornerback Adam "Pac-Man" Jones called a press conference Tuesday in order to emphasize that he will be nowhere near a possibly fatal stabbing that will occur during a fight involving several members…

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